Youth has its own set of problems. As parents, we might think them to be inconsequential, but, for them these pressure tests will pave the way to building their personality and shaping their future. Ignoring little things that impact them will not only make them feel as if you don’t care but also, make them stop conferring with you. As a parent, you need to be your child’s best friend and that is possible only if things that concern them are important to you as well.
The influence exerted by immediate friends and colleagues, to change ones beliefs and attitudes is known as peer pressure. This kind of pressure can be both negative and positive. Negative peer pressure would include things like trying drugs and alcohol, smoking, becoming a part of illegal activities like shoplifting, theft and so on. Unlike this, positive peer pressure will push them towards good behaviour, doing well in studies etc.
Remember, there was a time in life when you too experimented with stuff that would displease your parents, but you did it anyway. Your children are no different. As they grow up, there will be times when they will rebel and want to learn from their own mistakes and experiences. At such times, be supportive instead of going into the “ I TOLD YOU SO” mode. The time for being angry should come later, once they are receptive towards accepting their follies. This may take hours, days or weeks; use your judgement to know when the time is right.
Your children will not always have the best of friends. Instead of trying to alienate your kids from such peers try to teach them to differentiate between right and wrong. In the long run, this learning will come more handy rather than making social outcasts of them. Similarly, girls especially will try to emulate some fashion in their otherwise mundane lives. Instead of disparaging and scolding them, try to help them experiment and learn what looks good and what comprises vulgar.
Even if we don’t want, we still land up putting a lot of pressure on our children. This pressure is in the form of performing well in studies, doing well in life, etc. In most cases, we set our lives as a benchmark and expect our kids to outshine us. Most of the parents commit the folly of deciding and charting the future of their children even without consulting them. Bear in mind, the fact that, your kids might not have the same interests as you do. Hence, forcing them towards a certain career option is a bad move.
Your child is your own reflection. What you show them and teach them, is how they will conduct themselves in front of their children. So, set the right example and let your actions speak for themselves.